Bacon Shortage? OMG!

Possibly the most disturbing headline ever hit us this week: a worldwide bacon shortage is upon us. According to Britain's National Pig Association, droughts both here and abroad have pushed up feed prices, causing farmers to limit herd numbers to cut down on costs. So, stores may be stocked full now, but the NPA says the "bacon supply is contracting fast."

Some people, like Iowa Governor Terry Branstad, are taking the news in stride. "The deal about a shortage of bacon is a bunch of baloney," he told USNews.com. But not everyone has such faith.

Count me among those fearing the impending 'porkapolypse.' And like any other bacon-obsessed binger, I want to make sure I eat as much of the heavenly hog meat as possible. So, this morning, post-workout, I took myself directly to the local Burger King to order their desert sensation: the Bacon Sundae.

"Oh my God," is the first thing I hear when I collect my order. The whispered words come from the young woman behind me. She leans closer to her companion, "Is that really a bacon sundae?!" Her eyes are wide and bug-like. I smile right at her, "Yes, it is."

I grab a seat at the restaurant and take in the preposterousness of a.) eating an ice cream sundae directly following one of the most intense workouts of my life, and b.) a bacon-freaking-sundae!

Honestly, I'm salivating, so I dive right in. And let me tell you, it was good. Well, the bacon was good. Crispy, juicy, and flavorful. All the things you love about bacon done just right. This bacon seemed even better than the strips they top off the burgers with. It was like it was specially cooked for me, for my sundae.
The sundae, on the other hand, didn't knock my socks off. Vanilla soft serve was never my favorite thing. But damn, that bacon!

I stuff my face in about three minutes flat. It's only after I'm staring at the bottom of the empty styrofoam cup that I realize I'm in public. Did anyone witness my gluttonous gorge? I look around, only to see the lady from before is walking toward me.

"How was it?" she asks, politely looking past the chocolate remnants on my lip. "Great," I reply.

"Imma get me one of those, too!" And before I can reply, she's at the counter. 

My Plate: Beer Marinated Pork Chops

When it comes to evening boozing, "eating is cheating," is what I always say. Unless, that is, you can incorporate your beverage of choice into your meal. And, with the surprising health benefits of beer being touted lately, I decided to do just that with the exceptionally drinkable Brooklyn Brewery's Oktoberfest for dinner.

A slew of recent research finds beer can be good for everything from boosting heart, bone and brain strength, to reducing your risk of stroke and cancer. Beer can even help you live a longer, happier life, according to one study that concludes, "If European beer drinkers stopped imbibing, there would be a decrease in life expectancy of two years - and much unhappiness."

No need to sell me! I'm ecstatic about the news, and ready to baste my local butcher's pork chops in brew.

My marinade is simple, and luckily not measurement specific (which is handy once you've had a few). I just threw a few of the following ingredients in a large bowl:

Good glug of Olive Oil
Splash Soy Sauce
Splash Worcestershire Sauce
1 Clove Garlic
Juice of half Lemon
Tsp Brown Sugar
Good glug Oktoberfest
Sprinkle Salt and Pepper

Voila! Taste to make sure it's sweet or savory enough (I had to add a few more splashes of Soy and Worcestershire for my liking), then lay the chops to wait for about an hour - or until you're sufficiently boozed to cook.

I broiled mine, and saved some of the marinade to add to my leafy veg side. Absolutely delicious result. Enjoy!

Educated Eating: FLOTUS in the Lunchroom

More fruit and veg, less salty, fatty foods, wholegrain options and meat alternatives: sounds exactly like my new diet mandates. But, this list isn't what's on the menu in my kitchen, it's what's revolutionizing American cafeteria foods.

That's right. Pizza, burgers, chicken fingers and fries are no longer the school dining staple. And hey, whose staple are these foods? I always thought that kind of eating was for every once in a while - or when I'm suffering an epic hangover, which I'm pretty certain pre-12th graders aren't (legally).

And First Lady Michelle Obama (FLOTUS), thinks the same way. As part of her lunchroom 'Let's Move!' campaign to curb childhood obesity, she started at the one place every American kid eats at least one meal - school.

The Healthy, Hunger-Free Kids Act of 2010 bases food fixes on medical and scientific research showing the startlingly upward trend in childhood obesity. Basically, it's a no-nonsense approach to providing a healthy, well-rounded meal in the middle of a child's day. The only problem - she didn't ask the kids' permission. And they aren't happy.

Turns out they have no interest in getting the maximum benefit out of their school lunches. They just want to eat! Leading their hungry voices is a group of Kansas high schoolers who just released their grips on the hugely viral "We are Hungry" video. 

The "We are Young" parody is catchy, pretty well produced, and I'd venture to say a bit tongue in cheek. But the video has become fodder for critics blasting the FLOTUS' lunchroom plan. In particular, the 850 calorie limit to a 9-12th grader's lunch option.

"Think of a high-school boy who works out at least three hours a day, not including farm work," said an employee from said Kansas high school. 

Okay, let's do that. His lunch is 850 calories, and I'd think his breakfast and dinner are also in that ballpark. That puts him upwards of 2500 calories a day, not including the odd snack or - gasp! - soda. So, he's probably fine, and sporting a pretty tight six-pack at that. Considering he's in a state where obesity rates are set to hit 62% by 2030, I'd say that high school kid is doing pretty well for himself. What's the problem? 

Well, the problem is the same here as it is with any revolution. Kids miss having their say in the lunchroom. School can be a monotonous, even painful experience for adolescents, and their only escape each day is at lunch. I remember my own cafeteria days, and my go-to lunch staple: a six pack of Entenmann's powdered sugar donuts. Ahhh, that sweet, sugary escape!

But that brings me to another hugely important topic that seems to be gobbled up in the lunchroom debate: eating disorders. I'd binge on my the donuts, then purge for the rest of the day, through swim practice, show choir, and homework. It was cool to starve when I was in high school, and not surprisingly. Anorexia is the third most common illness among adolescents. 

Whether it's childhood obesity, or eating disorders, the cure begins with education. The FLOTUS' efforts - and the controversy it stirs up - will at least get people learning more about what eating healthy is all about. 

Now, if only she could just tackle that damn cafeteria table pecking order thing, the world would be a better place.